A Note on Nottingham and East Midlands Airport

I'm quite sadface that I didn't get to spend any time in England at all aside from the three hours I spent in their airport. The East Midlands Airport is a funny little thing; we did that European thing where you walk from the plane down some stairs to the tarmac, then walk inside the terminal. The departure terminal was some dinky little business; not much to look at at all. Or at least the check-in area was.

I was able to sample some English candy, which as I've mentioned on facebook, is amazing and special. (The rumors are true - the Kit-Kats are better there. Thanks lack of alkalis and no high fructose corn syrup!) I also had a real English muffin, which is about as much more awesome than a Thomas' English muffin as a bagel from a kosher deli in NY/NJ is than a Lender's bagel.

But here's the thing - they don't let you into the Departure area - the place with the gates - until a certain amount of time before your flight. So I guess about an hour before boarding, maybe an hour and a half, the little monitor says I can get moving - so I do.

And once I'm in the gate area, I am in Consumerist Heaven.

Now listen, Americans get a lot of shit for their capitalist and consumerist ways. A LOT. And I get that - but it's very obvious to me now where we learned it from! LOLOL!

I wish I'd thought to take pictures - but honestly, I was so overwhelmed by the spectacle, I didn't even think to get my camera.

Once I was through security, in order to get to the gates, I had to go through a huge store selling make-up, perfume, cigarettes, and all other manner of high-end luxury items.

I'm not talking about I had to pass by it - I'm talking I had to walk around displays, past the register!


This is a box of 1000 cigarettes. LOLOL

Then, when I got to the gate area, I discovered they don't tell you where your gate is right away. There are monitors up all over the place, and they have all the flights listed. At some point before one's boarding time (at least an hour, because it was up for mine when I got there), instead of the gate, next to the flight number and time it sayS "Relax and Shop."

LOLOL What?!

Oh, England, I need to see more of your funny.

Additionally, as reported, a little bit racist! LOLOL:



UNLEASH ME. RAWR. LOLOL!